THE SOPHOMORE SPECIES

This text by George Antheil is from his High School magazine:

 

*(Trenton Free Public Library, Trentoniana Collection, The Spectator, Junior Number, 1917,p. 1 „Literature“,

„THE SOPHOMORE SPECIES. A Post-Mortem Examination.“ By George Antheil, B1.

As a type the average Sophomore is easily distinguished. The Senior is usually the long, sleek individual with the cultured brow and a passion for Chaucer; a soft, sweet smile plays about the handsome features of the Junior as he thinks of love’s young dream or Wednesday afternoon dancing practice; but the howling ex-freshman who is the terror of his teachers and who sucks up his soup in the lunch room like the last water going down a drain is unmistakably a Sophomore the world over. His hands are large and ungainly, his ears two or three sizes too big, his grammar rather bad, still he laughs loudly at his own jokes, sweetly confident that they are the wittiest productions of the gae. He spends so much of his time trying to look intelligent that he hardly has any left to be really so. He is so astonished at his own profound wisdom that he sometimes sadly wonders why these poor, misguided teachers try to teach him anything.

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